Post by Egotistic on Apr 23, 2020 20:47:07 GMT -6
Shrikepaw
LichenClan
large torbie-and-white she-cat with green eyes
apprentice
she-cat
9 moons
Appearance
Aa BB CC Dd ii ll mcmc Ww XOXo
Effeminate, but not overly so—rugged, but not to the point of uncouthness, Shrikepaw appears to display the perfect balance between the two traits. Being both robust of build and large in size, the thick double coat on which she dotes only further exemplifies her immense proportions. It is from this coat that she derives the most pride, not only for its thickness and luster but for the myriad of colors it retains—the striking red and blacks, the potent whites which contrast so nicely with the green of her eyes, all coming together to create an alluring image of which she had never failed in using to her own personal advantage. As such, Shrikepaw goes to great length in ensuring its beauty is maintained, grooming it tirelessly to assure each feathery strand is preened to plush immaculacy.
However, for all the beauty her fur might possess, it is in build where Shrikepaw truly shines. Heavily muscled, it is as if each step were a testament to her budding strength—the broadness of her shoulders, thickness of her limbs, and swelling of her paws all alluding to the massive she will later grow to be. And yet, for all her size, Shrikepaw is by no means encumbered. Capable of explosive bouts of speed, though she lacks the stamina to maintain such feats for very long, her endurance on the battlefield paired with such herculean efforts of strength makes her a potent adversary… just not to the mice and rabbits in the brush.
In terms of facial features, Shrikepaw is also a sight to behold. Handsome as they come, her head is broad, ringed by a thick, patchwork mane and topped by proud, tufted ears. Her eyes are large and appealingly round, giving the full, boxy muzzle they sit atop, and the rugged counters of her face a certain softness that makes her pleasant to look upon.
Effeminate, but not overly so—rugged, but not to the point of uncouthness, Shrikepaw appears to display the perfect balance between the two traits. Being both robust of build and large in size, the thick double coat on which she dotes only further exemplifies her immense proportions. It is from this coat that she derives the most pride, not only for its thickness and luster but for the myriad of colors it retains—the striking red and blacks, the potent whites which contrast so nicely with the green of her eyes, all coming together to create an alluring image of which she had never failed in using to her own personal advantage. As such, Shrikepaw goes to great length in ensuring its beauty is maintained, grooming it tirelessly to assure each feathery strand is preened to plush immaculacy.
However, for all the beauty her fur might possess, it is in build where Shrikepaw truly shines. Heavily muscled, it is as if each step were a testament to her budding strength—the broadness of her shoulders, thickness of her limbs, and swelling of her paws all alluding to the massive she will later grow to be. And yet, for all her size, Shrikepaw is by no means encumbered. Capable of explosive bouts of speed, though she lacks the stamina to maintain such feats for very long, her endurance on the battlefield paired with such herculean efforts of strength makes her a potent adversary… just not to the mice and rabbits in the brush.
In terms of facial features, Shrikepaw is also a sight to behold. Handsome as they come, her head is broad, ringed by a thick, patchwork mane and topped by proud, tufted ears. Her eyes are large and appealingly round, giving the full, boxy muzzle they sit atop, and the rugged counters of her face a certain softness that makes her pleasant to look upon.
Personality
“People may whisper…”
Maintaining image is central to Shrikepaw’s identity. Fueled by her father’s ambitions as well as her own desires, she strives to become not only the strongest but the most powerful and indisputably influential figure on the island and goes to great lengths to orchestrate, cultivate and maintain her social standing.
To those that endure her company, Shrikepaw is an overtly grandiose individual, one who is not above effusing a sense of entitlement and superiority over others. This, in partnership with her own egocentrism, leads her to be one who not only perceives herself with an inflated sense of self but possesses an inability to untangle her own perspective from objective reality. This results in a skewed perception of importance, one that creates a world she can only view from being at the center of. She judges her own personal values as such—in relation to others—and feels the need to devalue them, setting herself apart from the “weak, cowardly and feeble-minded” to uphold her sense of self as perfect, justified and pure.
In this way, Shrikepaw perceives events only as they connect to her. She has little consideration for the wants and hardships of others unless some personal gain can be leeched from them, or they impact her in some way, choosing instead to present a cold and callous exterior lacking in anything in the form of empathy. Even when met with hardships of her own, she maintains a similarly unaffected guise, choosing to conquer if not suppress “weak” feelings and transform them into ones that embolden her sense of self-importance.
“…they’ll make their jokes. Let them.”
But that is not to say such a mentality is not without its shortcomings. Being so self-centered, Shrikepaw’s one-track mindedness makes her not only inflexible but unable (and unwilling) to see things from the perspective of others. This not only inhibits her own mental development but also her ability to truly consider and evaluate situations in a way that is effective, productive, and grounded. The result is a seemingly impulsive nature—a self-assuredness that has little consideration for the worst outcomes as they defile her perception of reality and perfection. As such, though cunning in her own way—conniving, controlling, and cruel—her inflated sense of self will ultimately be her downfall, and with time it will bring her more loss than benefit.
Similarly, while Shrikepaw may employ an outer veneer of superiority over others, its ultimate purpose is to disguise an inner sense of chronic vulnerability. To regulate this discomfort within herself is the main driving force in her unempathetic and volatile nature. She carries a deep mistrust of others, allowing her doubts to be revealed to no one but herself, believing any signs of weakness she presents will be used against her. Along with this victimization complex, there is a certain hypersensitivity she bears towards the criticism of others; her megalomaniacal personality and overlying narcissism are but tools to conceal a deep-rooted insecurity and instability of self.
As such, it is criticism she is ultimately fearful of. Having been reared in an environment overflowing with her father’s unfaltering judgment, there is nothing she fears more—no, hates more than to be looked down upon and critiqued. For there is nothing that impedes more on her view of the world than the reality of her own shortcomings, and should the two not meet the fantasy she feels entitled to, it presents a constant disappointment in self and a voracious appetite to appease.
At her worst, this emotional instability can be visibly seen in her torrential nature, beneath the emulated guise she designed after her father’s own imperviousness; however, she does well in ensuring such weakness is not revealed to her enemies, and as precaution drills herself to perfection.
“They’re so small, I can’t even see them.”
However, Shrikepaw’s motives should not be mistaken for mindless sadism; she is driven more by power than by pleasure or thrill. Rather, her main goal is to subdue her own self-doubt imbued in her since her mother’s passing and to conquer the vulnerability within through control and assurance. As such, all that she does is, in some way, premeditated, not impulsive. This is indicative of what will later become: of the Machiavellianism that will become an enduring personality through which the deception and fixation of controlling others will be born. With time she will grow further enamored with the power it presents her or promises to, with besting others to her own temporary satisfaction, though never as a means to an end. For even with all the strength in the world, her appetite is insatiable; indefinitely, she will always strive for more.
But even with all this said of her, she is not complete without compassion. She possesses some, or at least insofar as her family is concerned—and perhaps, at one point, even more before her mother’s passing. For at the root of Shrikepaw’s narcissism is the extension of self—what remains of her family: her father and kin. Though she seems to lack heart, Shrikepaw’s devotion to her family is her singular strength. She even feels a particular commitment to her mother—to her previous self before the slander of her own words corrupted her image and, in turn, her family. For, while he maintains and dismissive opinion of her mother and her wrongdoings, Pikeheart’s death was an event that ultimately had a devastating impact on Shrikepaw’s already fragile psyche. As such, it is her inability to reconcile her father’s perceived beliefs of her mother that remain a constant conflict for it does not align with the reality she once knew and is loath to let go of, even now.
For in losing her mother, Shrikepaw was met with an event she could not control—a realization that later resulted in her obsession with controlling every other facet of her life, including those she chose to share her company with. However, as she grows older, she has only just begun to realize just how powerless she truly is—how little power or say she actually has. It’s an unpleasant reality, and one she fights viciously, but at the heart of it all is her father.
The only one seemingly immune to her whims, though she may never speak of him with a semblance of fondness, it is him she truly wishes to control… and to satisfy. Desperately seeking the love and approval she found (and lost) in her mother, and having been denied it by her own father, it is the root of her volatile nature and callous exterior—the denial of that which she craves. It is the most lamentable affront to her person, one that has fueled her anger for as long as she can remember—an outrage that speaks of a father whose approval she shall never have, of a mother who left without consulting her, and herself for being unable to truly uphold her own unrealistic reality and self-perception.
And the irony of it all? Even should she obtain these things, they will bring her nothing in the way of happiness for she can never truly be satisfied.
Maintaining image is central to Shrikepaw’s identity. Fueled by her father’s ambitions as well as her own desires, she strives to become not only the strongest but the most powerful and indisputably influential figure on the island and goes to great lengths to orchestrate, cultivate and maintain her social standing.
To those that endure her company, Shrikepaw is an overtly grandiose individual, one who is not above effusing a sense of entitlement and superiority over others. This, in partnership with her own egocentrism, leads her to be one who not only perceives herself with an inflated sense of self but possesses an inability to untangle her own perspective from objective reality. This results in a skewed perception of importance, one that creates a world she can only view from being at the center of. She judges her own personal values as such—in relation to others—and feels the need to devalue them, setting herself apart from the “weak, cowardly and feeble-minded” to uphold her sense of self as perfect, justified and pure.
In this way, Shrikepaw perceives events only as they connect to her. She has little consideration for the wants and hardships of others unless some personal gain can be leeched from them, or they impact her in some way, choosing instead to present a cold and callous exterior lacking in anything in the form of empathy. Even when met with hardships of her own, she maintains a similarly unaffected guise, choosing to conquer if not suppress “weak” feelings and transform them into ones that embolden her sense of self-importance.
“…they’ll make their jokes. Let them.”
But that is not to say such a mentality is not without its shortcomings. Being so self-centered, Shrikepaw’s one-track mindedness makes her not only inflexible but unable (and unwilling) to see things from the perspective of others. This not only inhibits her own mental development but also her ability to truly consider and evaluate situations in a way that is effective, productive, and grounded. The result is a seemingly impulsive nature—a self-assuredness that has little consideration for the worst outcomes as they defile her perception of reality and perfection. As such, though cunning in her own way—conniving, controlling, and cruel—her inflated sense of self will ultimately be her downfall, and with time it will bring her more loss than benefit.
Similarly, while Shrikepaw may employ an outer veneer of superiority over others, its ultimate purpose is to disguise an inner sense of chronic vulnerability. To regulate this discomfort within herself is the main driving force in her unempathetic and volatile nature. She carries a deep mistrust of others, allowing her doubts to be revealed to no one but herself, believing any signs of weakness she presents will be used against her. Along with this victimization complex, there is a certain hypersensitivity she bears towards the criticism of others; her megalomaniacal personality and overlying narcissism are but tools to conceal a deep-rooted insecurity and instability of self.
As such, it is criticism she is ultimately fearful of. Having been reared in an environment overflowing with her father’s unfaltering judgment, there is nothing she fears more—no, hates more than to be looked down upon and critiqued. For there is nothing that impedes more on her view of the world than the reality of her own shortcomings, and should the two not meet the fantasy she feels entitled to, it presents a constant disappointment in self and a voracious appetite to appease.
At her worst, this emotional instability can be visibly seen in her torrential nature, beneath the emulated guise she designed after her father’s own imperviousness; however, she does well in ensuring such weakness is not revealed to her enemies, and as precaution drills herself to perfection.
“They’re so small, I can’t even see them.”
However, Shrikepaw’s motives should not be mistaken for mindless sadism; she is driven more by power than by pleasure or thrill. Rather, her main goal is to subdue her own self-doubt imbued in her since her mother’s passing and to conquer the vulnerability within through control and assurance. As such, all that she does is, in some way, premeditated, not impulsive. This is indicative of what will later become: of the Machiavellianism that will become an enduring personality through which the deception and fixation of controlling others will be born. With time she will grow further enamored with the power it presents her or promises to, with besting others to her own temporary satisfaction, though never as a means to an end. For even with all the strength in the world, her appetite is insatiable; indefinitely, she will always strive for more.
But even with all this said of her, she is not complete without compassion. She possesses some, or at least insofar as her family is concerned—and perhaps, at one point, even more before her mother’s passing. For at the root of Shrikepaw’s narcissism is the extension of self—what remains of her family: her father and kin. Though she seems to lack heart, Shrikepaw’s devotion to her family is her singular strength. She even feels a particular commitment to her mother—to her previous self before the slander of her own words corrupted her image and, in turn, her family. For, while he maintains and dismissive opinion of her mother and her wrongdoings, Pikeheart’s death was an event that ultimately had a devastating impact on Shrikepaw’s already fragile psyche. As such, it is her inability to reconcile her father’s perceived beliefs of her mother that remain a constant conflict for it does not align with the reality she once knew and is loath to let go of, even now.
For in losing her mother, Shrikepaw was met with an event she could not control—a realization that later resulted in her obsession with controlling every other facet of her life, including those she chose to share her company with. However, as she grows older, she has only just begun to realize just how powerless she truly is—how little power or say she actually has. It’s an unpleasant reality, and one she fights viciously, but at the heart of it all is her father.
The only one seemingly immune to her whims, though she may never speak of him with a semblance of fondness, it is him she truly wishes to control… and to satisfy. Desperately seeking the love and approval she found (and lost) in her mother, and having been denied it by her own father, it is the root of her volatile nature and callous exterior—the denial of that which she craves. It is the most lamentable affront to her person, one that has fueled her anger for as long as she can remember—an outrage that speaks of a father whose approval she shall never have, of a mother who left without consulting her, and herself for being unable to truly uphold her own unrealistic reality and self-perception.
And the irony of it all? Even should she obtain these things, they will bring her nothing in the way of happiness for she can never truly be satisfied.
History
Where Pikeheart came from a notorious line of veritable fighters and skilled hunters, Shrikepaw's father, Volefur, knew more modest beginnings. His family bore little in the way of a legacy for him; with nothing to their name but the most mundane achievements, their standing within the clan was coveted by none. But they got by well enough with what little they had, living their simple lives, carrying out their simple duties, working steadily towards their simple, uneventful deaths. And it took the transition into apprenticehood before Volefur thought to do anything about it.
Loath to lead the same mundane lives his parents did, from the moment his training was passed on to another warrior, he drilled himself in his studies. Night and day, he trained, honing his skills so that, one day, he could prove his worth. And in time, he was given that opportunity. As tensions rose between LichenClan and RedwoodClan, it was Volefur who was the first to step up and offer himself to fight in clans name, and since that fateful moment, he never ceased in his valor; however, it was not until he met Pikeheart that his status became genuinely tangible.
Born from an influential family, Pikeheart was a cat who was both veritable and beautiful. Noble in her carriage and refined in all else, Volefur saw in her not only her beauty but the status she would later provide him should he court her. And court her he did. Together they bore three new lives into the world—Merlinkit, Owlkit, and Shrikekit—each one as large as they were healthy and destined to uphold the legacy Volefur and Pikeheart intended to leave behind. But their status quickly came under question with the passing of Sagestar and the succession of Minnowstar.
A controversial rise to power, Pikeheart was the first of many to voice her misgivings with Minnowstar's reign, openly questioning the legitimacy of a female leader in a clan known to be patriarchal as well as denouncing the mottled she-cat's more extremist views, much to the outrage of Minnowstar and the horror of Volefur. Unfortunately, she was not given long to continue to voice her misgivings. Infuriated by Pikeheart's discrepancy, Minnowstar set to work in ensuring the she-cat would never be provided the time to speak so openly again.
During that time, Shrikepaw remembers seeing very little of her mother, though she fondly remembers the nights she would visit to lay alongside them and tuck them into the curl of her belly to whisper old legends in the hush of night. She also remembers her father, how he slowly began to change.
Without their mother to attend them as she had before, Volefur was quick in taking on the mantel, wasting little time in ensuring his kits were raised in his image. From him, all three were taught the values of leadership, the importance of authority, and the benefits of complete obedience. So adamantly did he preach his teachings that Shrikepaw began to forget at all the instructions of her mother… in fact, she had started to forget many things about her mother, the more their father spoke, the more he clouded her image into uncertainty.
And by the time their mother was killed in battle, Shrikepaw could remember even less. Gone were the fond memories of her mother cradling her in her paws, the rasp of her tongue or the scent of milk in her fur. Gone were the warm memories, of stories, of her doting words, how she showered them all with a love that seemed so painfully distant in their father's teachings. All she knew then when words spread of her mother's passing was that she had failed them, and in dying, she had betrayed her and her siblings, for, if she were to believe anything of what her father told her, it was their mother who had caused her own downfall.
As such, she thought nothing of it when Volefur denounced his mate, nor did she question when he denied them the right to attend her burial. Her head brimming with her father's teachings, she saw only a traitor, and as such, she did not fault her father from distancing them all from her sullied image. She only ensured that she did not walk down the same path their mother had in her moment of weakness and treason.
With more time, Volefur took their training into his own hand. He taught them to hunt, to fight, to track, hoping that he would give them each an edge during their apprenticeship that would inflate them in the clan's eyes. Shrikepaw excelled in these teachings. She was no hunter, but she could fight, and against her brothers, she was their equal, if not their superior. But if her abilities impressed her father, he never let them show. Himself more focused on his sons; after their mother's passing, she was seemingly swept under the rug. Why, Shrikepaw never knew, but if she were to listen to the gossip, it was because of how closely she resembled her mother. Every time he looked at her, it was like looking towards the face of a traitor born anew. A monster.
Still, Shrikepaw did not falter in her efforts. She trained as hard as her brothers did, she fought just as fiercely if not fiercer, but again to no avail. Even upon the arrival of her apprentice ceremony as they each strode up to brush noses with Minnowstar, she remembers the look her father had given her—not one of love, but revulsion, as if she were something corrupt and foul.
It was the last time the two would ever share a look between each other for some while.
Entrenching herself in her training, Shrikepaw willingly fell into her duties without a word of complaint, maintaining her father's teachings with a perverse tenacity while her own nature grows steadily more volatile and harder to control.
Loath to lead the same mundane lives his parents did, from the moment his training was passed on to another warrior, he drilled himself in his studies. Night and day, he trained, honing his skills so that, one day, he could prove his worth. And in time, he was given that opportunity. As tensions rose between LichenClan and RedwoodClan, it was Volefur who was the first to step up and offer himself to fight in clans name, and since that fateful moment, he never ceased in his valor; however, it was not until he met Pikeheart that his status became genuinely tangible.
Born from an influential family, Pikeheart was a cat who was both veritable and beautiful. Noble in her carriage and refined in all else, Volefur saw in her not only her beauty but the status she would later provide him should he court her. And court her he did. Together they bore three new lives into the world—Merlinkit, Owlkit, and Shrikekit—each one as large as they were healthy and destined to uphold the legacy Volefur and Pikeheart intended to leave behind. But their status quickly came under question with the passing of Sagestar and the succession of Minnowstar.
A controversial rise to power, Pikeheart was the first of many to voice her misgivings with Minnowstar's reign, openly questioning the legitimacy of a female leader in a clan known to be patriarchal as well as denouncing the mottled she-cat's more extremist views, much to the outrage of Minnowstar and the horror of Volefur. Unfortunately, she was not given long to continue to voice her misgivings. Infuriated by Pikeheart's discrepancy, Minnowstar set to work in ensuring the she-cat would never be provided the time to speak so openly again.
During that time, Shrikepaw remembers seeing very little of her mother, though she fondly remembers the nights she would visit to lay alongside them and tuck them into the curl of her belly to whisper old legends in the hush of night. She also remembers her father, how he slowly began to change.
Without their mother to attend them as she had before, Volefur was quick in taking on the mantel, wasting little time in ensuring his kits were raised in his image. From him, all three were taught the values of leadership, the importance of authority, and the benefits of complete obedience. So adamantly did he preach his teachings that Shrikepaw began to forget at all the instructions of her mother… in fact, she had started to forget many things about her mother, the more their father spoke, the more he clouded her image into uncertainty.
And by the time their mother was killed in battle, Shrikepaw could remember even less. Gone were the fond memories of her mother cradling her in her paws, the rasp of her tongue or the scent of milk in her fur. Gone were the warm memories, of stories, of her doting words, how she showered them all with a love that seemed so painfully distant in their father's teachings. All she knew then when words spread of her mother's passing was that she had failed them, and in dying, she had betrayed her and her siblings, for, if she were to believe anything of what her father told her, it was their mother who had caused her own downfall.
As such, she thought nothing of it when Volefur denounced his mate, nor did she question when he denied them the right to attend her burial. Her head brimming with her father's teachings, she saw only a traitor, and as such, she did not fault her father from distancing them all from her sullied image. She only ensured that she did not walk down the same path their mother had in her moment of weakness and treason.
With more time, Volefur took their training into his own hand. He taught them to hunt, to fight, to track, hoping that he would give them each an edge during their apprenticeship that would inflate them in the clan's eyes. Shrikepaw excelled in these teachings. She was no hunter, but she could fight, and against her brothers, she was their equal, if not their superior. But if her abilities impressed her father, he never let them show. Himself more focused on his sons; after their mother's passing, she was seemingly swept under the rug. Why, Shrikepaw never knew, but if she were to listen to the gossip, it was because of how closely she resembled her mother. Every time he looked at her, it was like looking towards the face of a traitor born anew. A monster.
Still, Shrikepaw did not falter in her efforts. She trained as hard as her brothers did, she fought just as fiercely if not fiercer, but again to no avail. Even upon the arrival of her apprentice ceremony as they each strode up to brush noses with Minnowstar, she remembers the look her father had given her—not one of love, but revulsion, as if she were something corrupt and foul.
It was the last time the two would ever share a look between each other for some while.
Entrenching herself in her training, Shrikepaw willingly fell into her duties without a word of complaint, maintaining her father's teachings with a perverse tenacity while her own nature grows steadily more volatile and harder to control.
